


it's sort of a web comic

by unimate



Category: Homestuck, Metal Gear
Genre: Gen, Philanthropy Era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-28
Updated: 2020-07-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:48:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25577581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unimate/pseuds/unimate
Summary: SNAKE: we’ve been through this, i don’t care about whatever weird cartoon porn you’re reading. after the thing with the tentacles, i feel like i’ve seen it all.OTACON: Well, there’s definitely more than one thing with tentacles…OTACON: But this isn’t porn! It’s just…the story is at sort of a weird place.(otacon explains homestuck to snake. that's literally it.)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 24





	it's sort of a web comic

**Author's Note:**

> drabble for gumba, who wanted Snake and Otacon talking about homestuck. so i decided to make it a pesterlog.

SNAKE: hey. 

OTACON: Oh! David, I didn’t hear you come in. I mean, I never hear you come in. 

SNAKE: i need a shower, it’s like a sauna out there. 

OTACON: You’re dripping sweat. How was the run? 

SNAKE: sweaty. why are you covering your laptop screen like that?  
SNAKE: we’ve been through this, i don’t care about whatever weird cartoon porn you’re reading. after the thing with the tentacles, i feel like i’ve seen it all. 

OTACON: Well, there’s definitely more than one thing with tentacles…  
OTACON: But this isn’t porn! It’s just…the story is at sort of a weird place. 

SNAKE: let me be the judge of that, i seriously doubt any of it can be weirder than that show about the kid everybody keeps yelling at to get in the robot. 

OTACON: Stop jerking me around, I know you know what it’s called. 

SNAKE: yeah, but it’s always funnier to pretend i don’t. let me see.  
SNAKE: huh.  
SNAKE: is that a cartoon clown with a huge—

OTACON: Yes. But I promise it makes more sense in context. 

SNAKE: really. 

OTACON: Well, yes and no. This guy is an alien. But also a clown, for religious purposes. There’s a whole backstory to it. 

SNAKE: hn.  
SNAKE: aren’t aliens usually a little…rounder? less hair? 

OTACON: Maybe if you’ve only ever watched movies made before the 1980’s! 

SNAKE: i’ve mostly watched movies you’ve made me sit through at gunpoint. 

OTACON: ha ha. 

SNAKE: so what is this…big dicked clown story? 

OTACON: It’s called Homestuck! It’s a completely free story online. 

SNAKE: so it’s…what, a comic? 

OTACON: Sort of!  
OTACON: It’s a little hard to explain. See, I’ll show you the beginning. 

SNAKE: “a young man stands in his room.”  
SNAKE: this looks a little more normal. 

OTACON: Heh. 

SNAKE: what? 

OTACON: The legendary Solid Snake, wanting something to be normal.  
OTACON: Fought any giant robots lately? 

SNAKE: as the guy who designed those robots, i don’t think you have much of a leg to stand on here.  
SNAKE: we make our own normal. 

OTACON: Well, the story doesn’t stay normal for very long. The presentation is really unique, it isn’t anything like the usual multi-panel format of most webcomics, and it focuses much more heavily on prose and dialogue than almost any other visual-heavy story out there.  
OTACON: The author has said that he is way more concerned with speed than with uniformity and the story develops organically, reacting to the audience in real time!  
OTACON: It’s honestly revolutionary! 

SNAKE: you sound pretty into it. 

OTACON: I mean…well, I’m quite a bit older than the comic’s main demographic, but there’s a pretty active online community.  
OTACON: And it’s something to do while I’m waiting for code to compile. 

SNAKE: huh.  
SNAKE: wow, that’s a lot of text. 

OTACON: Oh, that’s nothing. 

SNAKE: might be a little much. 

OTACON: Don’t try to pull the meathead routine on me, I’ve seen your cognitive test results! 

SNAKE: a high iq doesn’t mean i want to give myself a migraine reading colored text on a grey background.  
SNAKE: oh, looks like there’s a dave. 

OTACON: There is! He’s one of the four main characters.  
OTACON: …There’s actually a Hal, too. 

SNAKE: no shit.  
SNAKE: do they know each other? 

OTACON: Hm…I’m not sure if they’ve actually met yet. 

SNAKE: is hal a skinny nerd with terrible taste in snack foods and pornography? 

OTACON: Sort of…?  
OTACON: He’s actually not a real ‘person’.  
OTACON: He’s an artificial intelligence programmed into a pair of glasses. You know, kind of like the Hal I’m named after.  
OTACON: He’s actually a copy of Dave’s brother’s brain.  
OTACON: Or, well. He’s not really Dave’s brother, he’s TECHNICALLY his father, but they’re the same age, since they come from different time continuity’s.  
OTACON: But he grew up thinking they were brothers. 

SNAKE: uh huh. 

OTACON: Aggghh, I’m not explaining it well at all!  
OTACON: It’s really good though, I think you’d like it.  
OTACON: I’ve actually thought about reaching out to the author in a, you know, exploratory fashion. 

SNAKE: oh yeah? you think a comic book author would want to join philanthropy? 

OTACON: It’s just…some of the things he writes about hit a little close to home. Almost as if he might have some experience with the Patriots, and their suppressed technology… 

SNAKE: is that right. 

OTACON: Why are you looking at me like that? 

SNAKE: are you sure you aren’t just trying to meet an author you like? 

OTACON: W-What? I’m insulted, Snake! I’d never waste Philanthropy resources on something like that, it would be incredibly irresponsible in my role as information specialist! 

SNAKE: sure.  
SNAKE: anyway, i need to shower. have fun with your dick clowns. 

OTACON: Yeah, yeah.

**Author's Note:**

> anyway, this is all canon. snake and otacon are both homestucks and they both stan vriska.


End file.
